Gretchen Ann Ryan

Gretchen Ann Ryan passed away at the age of 85 on Sunday, April 19, 2020, losing a battle with lung cancer.

Gretchen was born to Alice (Pearson) Cox and Joseph Cox on February 3, 1935, and raised in Fort Collins, Colorado. She graduated from Fort Collins High School and attended Colorado State University, where Gretchen met the love of her life, Jim Ryan, at a fraternity/sorority function. They were married on June 13, 1954, and graduated from college in June 1956. Their daughter, Melanie, was born three weeks later.

Gretchen supported Jim’s career as a bomber pilot in the Air Force through her active participation in each base’s Officers’ Wives’ Club and through volunteer activities at the hospital and churches on base. While stationed at Grand Forks AFB, Jim retired in 1976 and he and Gretchen attended graduate school at UND. Jim got his Master’s degree in Accounting, passed the CPA exam, and got a job teaching accounting at the University of Mary in Bismarck. Gretchen got a job at the North Dakota State Tax Department, first as Administrative Officer and then as the Director of Management Planning and Personnel. While she worked there, she received her Master’s degree in Public Administration. In 2001, Jim and Gretchen moved to McAllen, Texas, following their retirement. After Jim died in June 2002, Gretchen stayed in McAllen until December 2010, when she moved to Parkwood Place in Grand Forks. She moved to Silver Waters in 2016. She treasured the friends she made at both places.

Gretchen took big bites out of life. She had many hobbies and excelled at nearly all of them. She was a gourmet cook; she was an accomplished seamstress who could make everything from sport coats to dresses to swimwear; she knitted or crocheted amazing afghans, sweaters, hats, and stuffed animals; and she loved horses and was an expert horsewoman. A music lover, Gretchen was a fantastic keyboardist, playing accordion, piano (to accompany the Officers’ Wives’ Club chorus and the Parkwood chorus), and church organ (she was a church organist for two different congregations). She was a terrific bridge player and taught a beginning bridge class, passing along her love of the game and making very close friends in the process. North Dakota football and hockey teams (men’s and women’s) never had a prouder fan.

Gretchen also loved to travel. When stationed at Bitburg Air Force Base in Germany, she, Jim, and Melanie visited nearly every European country. After Jim’s death, she continued to travel, exploring the Glendalough monastery cemetery in Ireland, snorkeling at the Great Barrier Reef, drinking champagne while watching the sun set on Uluru, riding a camel in central Australia, eating hazelnut gelato in San Gimignano in Italy, white-water rafting in Alaska, and tromping all over the Kremlin.

More than her hobbies and traveling, Gretchen loved her family. She begged for a baby sister and was granted her wish at six years old when Katie was born. She soon learned that it wasn’t a lot of fun because she couldn’t play with an infant, but Katie grew up to be her dearest friend. Gretchen was almost ridiculously proud of her daughter, Melanie, and her grandchildren, Allison and Michael. She considered it one of the great privileges of her life to be a grandmother (and she was amazing at it), so she was thrilled when Allison married in 2018 and she got a second grandson as well as two great-grandsons.

 Gretchen wrote that once, when Santa asked if she’d been a good little girl, she responded, “I’ve tried awfully hard.” She said that she may not “have been the best wife, mother, grandmother, mother-in-law, sister, or friend…but [she] tried awfully hard.”

Gretchen was preceded in death by her soulmate, Jim, and will be missed by her daughter, Melanie (Bob) Jensen of Grand Forks; her granddaughter, Allison Hetland (Chris Henderson) of Grand Forks; her grandson, Michael Hetland of Grand Forks, her sister, Katie Marley of Saluda, North Carolina; her great-grandsons, Liam and Landon Henderson of Grand Forks; and her many friends.

A celebration of Gretchen’s life will be held later when social distancing is relaxed. Should you wish to do so, please donate in Gretchen’s memory to Turtle Mountain Animal Rescue, Circle of Friends Humane Society, Altru Hospice, or any other charity that is special to you.